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November 25, 2006

Oh Dark Thirty in the Garden of Good and Evil

Robert Altman Checks Out.

My cinema hero, Robert Altman, still has his latest movie in the video store racks, "A Prarie Home Companion". I haven't seen it yet, and he won't be seeing it again. But considering it's an Altman movie and all, my resistance to grabbing it when it was hot off the press still lacks explanation.

That despite the fact that for me, no one other than Altman or perhaps Wim Wenders could be expected to derive value from balancing the neurotic quirkiness that I dislike about Prarie Homes with the globally waning general interest in popporn queen Lindsay Lohan. I mean She Is You Know So Over.

More or less.

Popporn -- inhabited mainly by Tara Reid, Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Lohan herself, Christine Aguilera, and Scarlett Johannson -- prominently features a drastically diverse spread of talent, from Johannson (whose group membership is just skinnydipping) to Reid (who co-opted the space thought previously to have belonged, through manifest destiny, to real porn swinger Tracy Lords. Inexplicably, both parties, Reid and Lords, have dropped the ball, but it's probably a good thing.)

Comparing again the great to lame in this bunch, Aguilera, whose superiority to Spears is nearly blinding in its intensity, is just slumming; however, where the media is involved, she may be suffering from true independence. For example, regarding her involvement, we can easily imagine that Hollywood is actually looking the other way just to promote its belief that she, like anyone, can be replaced and that it won't need her. But she would be the way she is even if all the others in popporn or Hollywood were gone.

Meanwhile, the importance of popporn is that it is illegimate. It's not real porn, it's fake porn done through real acting instead of real porn done through fake acting. We see that the girls want to play the role -- otherwise, why would anyone care.

So -- what about Altman and Lohan? (Whattaya mean 'Altman "and" Lohan'...?) He was interested?

No chance he was only cradle-robbing, because he wouldn't put his name on the film if the film wasn't working. No, I think maybe it's more like him paddling the boat that could carry Lohan across the river Styx from a looming hell to some uncertain but preferable promised land. But why would he bother? Well, there's the punchline: could anyone other than Altman actually discover someone who had already been discovered, and get full credit for it? (Possibly Wim Wenders.)

Having not seen the film yet, I get to think there's still a chance that this might be obviously and truly the case on the screen. And if it turns out not to be, there will still be plenty of Altman flicks to watch again, and of course popporn will remain alive and well even through significant attritions, extractions and graduations.

It's just that now we won't have an authentic Altman extravaganza on YouTube featuring popporners. This was the necessary next step -- getting the mass media icons to slum on the alternate network under the direction of an iconic Hollywood heretic.

Oh well. Who's our daddy now?

Posted by Malcolm Ryder at November 25, 2006 5:21 PM

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Comments

I share your viewpoint re Lohan and PHC. And re Altman, I should add.
I didn't go to see it either.
But I saw it last night with gf (at her suggestion) and I must say, it's just dandy. Vintage Altman. Lohan's part is small, but well done. Lilly Tomlin is great. The usual great Altman small roles by Woody Harrelson, Kevin Kline. Streep is Streep. And I gotta say, Keilor is just fine.
But it's really all Altman.
Which is why it sounds like you should see it.

Posted by: Charles H. Green at November 26, 2006 2:13 PM

M,
As you say, I am deep into reconciling "how I am now, with how I am going to be next." Thank you for the elegantly phrased discussion of such ineffable, but fundamental issues.
E.

Posted by: Everett H. Scott at November 27, 2006 7:15 AM

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